Live Life Now
The new year is quickly approaching. In the business of this season, I hope that we don't put off for tomorrow things that we will regret. So, what have you been avoiding or putting off? Consider if there may be things that you can do to help this year finish on a good note.
Recognizing the power and worth of each day helps us make wise decisions. Each day we are making choices about who we will be and how we will show up. Time is too precious to squander it simply by going through the motions. How many times are we with loved ones, but our mind is elsewhere? How often do we miss the beauty around us in our rush to get to the next thing? Are we living in our phones rather than being present in our lives?
Making real and loving connections with those around us adds joy to life. As you approach the end of this year and cycle to a new year, I would like to challenge you to take a few moments each day to:
Smile at a stranger (light up your eyes and nod your head if you are wearing a mask)
Make eye contact with loved ones
Put your phone down and talk to your partner, child, or friend
Apologize to someone you have hurt
Do or use something you have been saving for a special occasion
Make today special by focusing on gratitude
Make contact with nature
Walk a little more
Make someone else smile
Treasure peaceful, happy moments
Embrace and enjoy life amidst the messiness. The following story perfectly illustrates the consequences of putting off until later that which we could savor today.
“My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister’s bureau and lifted out a tissue-wrapped package.
”This,” he said, “is not a slip. This is lingerie.”
He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip. It was exquisite: silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price tag with an astronomical figure on it was still attached.
”Jan bought this the first time we went to New York, at least eight or nine years ago. She never wore it. She was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is the occasion.”
He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes we were taking to the mortician. His hands lingered on the soft material for a moment. Then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me.
”Don’t ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you’re alive is a special occasion.”
I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores that follow an unexpected death. I thought about them on the plane returning to California from the Midwestern town where my sister’s family lives. I thought about all the things that she hadn’t seen or heard or done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special.
I’m still thinking about his words, and they’ve changed my life. I’m reading more and dusting less. I’m sitting on the deck and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I’m spending more time with my family and friends and less time in committee meetings.
Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not endure. I’m trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.
I’m not “saving” anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event—such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, the first camellia blossom.
I wear my good blazer to the market if I feel like it. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for a small bag of groceries without wincing.
I’m not saving my good perfume for special parties; clerks in hardware stores and tellers in banks have noses that function as well as my party-going friends.
”Someday” and “one of these days” are fighting a losing battle to stay in my vocabulary. If it’s worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now.
I’m not sure what my sister would have done had she known that she wouldn’t be here for the tomorrow we all take for granted. I think she would have called family members and a few close friends. She might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think she would have gone out for a Chinese dinner, her favorite food. I’m guessing—I’ll never know.”